(Photo Credit: Vieria_da_Silva – “Nowhere In Sight”)

My goal is to arrive nowhere.

This sounds strange, doesn’t it? Not to mention that it took me years to realize that my goal is to arrive nowhere.

In the beginning, there were no questions. There were answers arising from no questions – like the Big Bang emanating from no cause – which I was supposed to live by.  And I did live by those answers, to the best of my ability, without questioning. Questions were tabooed.

I may have registered some impressions in the course of life, unconsciously, responding to some questions arising out of curiosity, triggered by some inquisitive DNA that I may have inherited in my essence. These impressions found their expression in questioning the viability of some of the beaten paths. Subsequently, I realized that these paths were built on unfounded grounds.

(Photo Credit: nasrul ekram – “Ponder”)

I rebelled, though not openly. ‘Rebellion’ is a bad word in the common belief system and I needed my immediate world to remain intact for upkeep. On the outside I remained the same person they thought I was – though their individual images of me differed slightly – but on the inside I questioned every answer. I brought every answer of every question within the periphery of questions. Now there were questions and no answers.

Soon I realized that where there are questions there are answers, and that every question is pregnant with an answer. When I questioned – ‘Who am I?’ – the answer was delivered to me in the form of another question – ‘Who is asking this question?’. ‘I’ became my questioner, but I was one among many, just a tiny part of the so called ‘me’ that my friends and my family took as some freak personality trait. ‘I’ was not singular.

I turned into a battle ground, inside; into a stage, outside.

Questioning is confronting, face to face. I had found a new voice and it questioned my tendency of parroting. I realized that I was parroting when I questioned if I was parroting. My new found identity refused to depend solely upon the past data’s and the so called dualistic ‘knowledge of good and evil’. This new self analyzed and evaluated everything based on observation, defying historical patterns.

(Photo Credit: Beshef – “Nowhere”)

Paths are ways that take you to destinations that you choose to arrive. At times, you find or take yourself on a path without knowing any other path. You follow that path because there are others following it. After all, the herd has a natural tendency to follow the herd. They never question the veracity of the path. You arrive at a destination which isn’t yours but you accept it because you have arrived there. A path destined to arrive in London can’t lead you to Tokyo.

Traversing on some of these beaten paths, I questioned:

How can truth have any path? How can truth have any destination? Can Truth, the omnipresent, be confined to time or to a place? Can IT have a shape, property or color? Can it confine to any land?

Ashok - My Goal is to Arrive Nowhere

 

I didn’t receive answers, but glimpses. I saw that, as long as we do not interfere with it, life is a series of happenings. I interfered, in bits and pieces, defying the effect of the happenings. In my defiance I Saw how my Undoing metamorphosed into Doing. I witness the rest ‘happen’ in passivity, as my failure to ‘undo’ the happenings caused by two factors that must reconcile within the third, caused by a series of chains of cause and effect influencing every factor. I Knew that all I needed to do to unshackle myself from these incessant chains of cause and effect was to change my role from that of active to passive, or that of passive to active.

The glimpses revealed to me: ‘UNDO every path and you shall be on the pathless path.’

I am on a pathless path now endeavoring to walk unwalked. My destination is beyond the bounds of the dimension of space and time. The destination is not ‘there’ nor is it in any ‘then’. On the contrary, the destination is very much here and Now. There are no questions here and Now. There are no answers here and Now. HERE and NOW, without cause.

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