One cannot be born afresh if one isn’t prepared to die. I told this fact to her, to which she responded by saying- ‘I know. Jesus said it – Verilyverily I say unto thee, unless a man be born again, he cannot see the Kingdom of God.” 

 I wanted no god to intervene in my affairs. So I said – ‘Yes, he also said ‘the kingdom is inside you…(and outside you’ I left unsaid).

‘I want to’ – she said assertively.

‘Let’s then try and die.’- I said encouraged by her positive response. ‘Let’s give us six months to die completely’- I added, in my endeavor to program a complete death on the physical time scale. She agreed.

But a question cropped up- How? This wasn’t an easy task in the wake of our repeated failure in endeavor to stick to certain discipline. How do we attain this impossible feat of ‘a complete death’ in mere six months?

As such, we knew what ‘a complete death’ meant so I see no need to explain ‘why’ of it. But, fixing of the time frame made it utterly necessary for us to evolve a full proof, step by step, methodology; a process we can follow so as to walk on the course of a complete death.

This idea had always been luring, at least intellectually, ever since we understood the metaphysical concept of death. We had set this goal, many a times, in the past, but ever failed to program us with any program on any strict time frame. We failed to generate a drive to walk unwalked on the intended path.

But let me first kill my excitement generating from her assertive affirmation. Excitement would prove to be counterproductive. I must not let go my composure, my serene sobriety.

Death to us, as such, is metaphysical considering body is just a form. It’s the mind with all the historical data’s at its disposal that lived us, disguised as various selves, born out of various contradictory impressions, commanding us by usurping our attention. In this hubbub, with our attention at ‘their’ disposal, ‘we’ hardly had any chance to live an active life we can call ours., a life we ever intended.

‘They had to be neutralized’- I said.

‘Yes’- she said in agreement- ‘as they cannot be liquidated.’

‘We try and win their energy sources’- I added feeling good that we were on the same page, trying to find a methodology.

We together were not only capable of battling them out as we understood the whole concept metaphysically but also that we were fated to do so. This is why we needed six months which, as such, wasn’t sufficient time considering not many (if any in actuality) had born afresh in the history of mankind.

‘Let’s go all out- I thought but heard me saying it loudly.

‘Let’s go all out’- she voiced my voice.


‘They’, as we knew them and had ever witnessed them maltreating and mauling ‘us’ energized by everything external, be it a person or a place, sound or shape, space or time, object or color and internally, thoughts or desires, moods or emotions, everything….everything. As the mind is one dimensional being, these selves, mothered by mind, too liked to ‘live’ in the dead time, projecting the same in the assumed time. What if we decide from this very moment to not to visit ‘next’ which obviously is the projection of the past. No traversing either in dead or assumed time- I decided.

‘We arrive nowhere’- I said nut shelling my entire thought process.

‘We arrive nowhere’- she repeated in agreement.

‘I don’t think we need anything more to undo’- I added – ‘because when we arrive nowhere, we arrive at our intended ‘noplace’. Here is nothing more to undo. When we arrive nowhere, we are ever here and here dwells just ‘us’ ever afresh, without a past.

‘Yes’ – she said in affirmation ‘no past data’s to project onto ‘next’. Do you know what happens when we attain ‘inner unity’ in the absence of any of two, in the absence of any of them? Tell me’ She pleaded in earnest.

‘We march towards ‘awareness’ and merge. One becomes none. We are born afresh in totality.’

‘Yes, in ‘notime’ here are no selves, no history, no time, dead or assumed’- She felt a little excited.

‘Kill the excitement or else excitement will kill ‘us’- I said and added – ‘excitement will transport and dump us in the domain of time.’

Oasis by Tobylyn Marjeta

Oasis by Tobylyn Marjeta

But, she had already left. Excitement caused by mind had succeeded in trapping her and I knew she would be traversing some escape route justifying it.

How can one born afresh who cannot stand ‘death’ for a moment.


PS: But she returned. And we have resolved to start afresh waiting for our D day, six months from now.